Healthier Co-Parenting Solutions for everyone that's involved!

Start Your Journey Here...

Co-Parenting

Ultimate Guide to Co-Parenting

Happy Divorce

Ultimate Guide to a Happy Divorce

Dealing With a Narcissist

Ultimate Guide to Co-Parenting with a Narcissist

About Two Healthy Homes

Two Healthy Homes is the life’s work of Dr. Erica Ellis, a licensed child psychologist and co-parenting expert. Over the past 30 years, Dr. Ellis has helped thousands of families navigate the divorce and co-parenting process in a way that protects the long-term well-being of the entire family. 

CPI’s mission is to empower and support parents with all the tools, knowledge, and skills to avoid unnecessary emotional damage and create a healthy, thriving future for themselves and their children.

Featured In

logo-003.png
logo-002.png
logo-001.png

Frequently Asked Questions

Co-parenting is defined as two parents who no longer live together working collaboratively to raise their children. While it can take many forms, with many different parenting plans, the goal is to create a relationship where both parents are playing an active role in all aspects of their children’s lives. It works best when decisions are made based upon the best interest of the children. 

It is absolutely possible, but not easy, to have a happy divorce. While painful and incredibly challenging, the divorce presents an opportunity to reconfigure your family in a way that has the potential for greater happiness for you, your children, and your ex. In order to achieve that goal, you must address the three primary relationships in your life to get you to that better place: with yourself, with your ex, and with your children. 

A person with a Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) has a long-standing pattern of thinking and behavior that negatively impacts all aspects of their functioning. It is marked by a lack of empathy, a grandiose sense of self, a need for constant attention, a sense of entitlement, and an inability to modulate their mood or behavior. 

The combination of emotional and behavioral instability results in the narcissist being a very challenging co-parenting partner. They lack the ability to do many of the things necessary to make co-parenting work, including respectful communication, compromising to resolve differences, putting the children’s needs first, and keeping emotions in check to avoid conflict. Parallel parenting is often the most effective means of raising children in this situation. In this type of parenting arrangement, the amount of interaction between the two high-conflict parents is minimized as much as possible. Each parent has their own areas of responsibility so they minimize the need for interaction and collaboration. Face to face communication is avoided. 

Even with parallel parenting in place, there remains the potential for both you and your children to experience further emotional damage at the hands of the narcissist. To minimize the chances of this happening:
**expect challenges and approach them calmly and rationally
**fully embrace the reality that you have no power to change your ex
**avoid emotional arguments whenever possible
**establish firm boundaries, especially about communication
**create a detailed parenting plan that you always follow
The goal of co-parenting counseling is to teach you and your ex the skills and strategies necessary to be the best possible parents for your children. This is accomplished through:
 
**learning effective ways to communicate
**developing healthy ways to resolve conflict
**committing to rising about your issues/emotions for the sake of your children
**creating a co-parenting plan based upon your children’s unique needs and ages
 
It differs from marital therapy in that it is focused on the present and the future, not on re-hashing the past. The process is skill-based and strategic, equipping you with the tools to work together on your children’s behalf

Praise

"The support, guidance, and insights provided by Erica and the The Co-Parenting Institute have been invaluable in helping me and my family during this challenging time. Erica has helped me to look at the process in a different way, totally focused on the children's best interests, but also helping me to take better care of myself and my mental health. I am so grateful I came across this resource early in the divorce process as I know that the strategies I am learning now will help me in the many years of co-parenting that lie ahead."
KiriNew Zealand
"I've worked with Erica in some capacity for the better part of a decade. She has the uncanny ability to really cut through the noise of even the most contentious relationships to ensure that some level of harmony is achieved. She makes sure the parents' voices are heard and, better yet, their values respected. Her approach is always calm, reasoned, and focused on helping the parents transition to a co-parenting relationship in as holistic a way as possible. I have recommended her to every client that I have and I will always continue to do so."
Lauren Hunt, Esq New York
"I have had the opportunity to work with Erica on many occasions. She has served as a Divorce Facilitator on many of my Collaborative cases. Even in my non-Collaborative high conflict cases, I have used her to help act as a mediator to resolve custody and co-parenting issues. Erica is very skilled at ensuring people take the focus from whatever dispute has gotten them here to keeping them on track to understanding that they still have a job to do as co-parents. Based upon my experience working with her, I can recommend Erica enthusiastically to assist any parents going through a divorce process, especially when kids are involved.”
Kelly Curro, Esq New York
"Working with Erica was really a pleasure. She was able to very quickly assess the situation and cut through a lot of the difficult emotions that my son’s father and I both had that were going to hinder the negotiation process or slow us down. She was able to keep us focused on what the best needs of our son are."
SaimaNew York
Previous
Next